From the home office in a dingy basement on Centauri Prime:
Top ten reasons Commander Riker walks with his head tilted
10. He’s keeping an eye on the top window of the bridge just in case a warbird materializes on the z-axis.
9. He’s hoping he’ll be the first to spot a dropped bar of gold-pressed latinum.
8. He lost his favorite marked poker deck.
7. He’s practiced the Kama Sutra on one too many aliens.
6. Wesley keeps telling him, “Whoa, Commander, the horse is out of the barn!”
5. He’s measuring Troi’s cup size.
4. He’s trying to see up Troi’s dress.
3. Worf ripped his head off, and Crusher reattached it.
2. He’s surreptitiously measuring Picard’s captain’s chair.
And the #1 reason Riker walks with his head tilted sideways:
1. He’s trying to make the hair fall out of his head because he heard that only bald guys get to command the Enterprise.
Copyright © Diane L. Schirf
(reposted because someone’s still reading it)